Released!

As long as we're going with this new thing of taking the message at face value, I have a new entry. Ten days ago I read this:

Fear nothing in the things you are about to suffer, but stay on guard. Fear nothing. You are about to be thrown into jail for a time of testing-ten days, it won't last forever.

I have to admit when I read it, I was truly scared and felt like something awful was going to happen. There have been a couple of bumps in these ten days.

This evening our PCP called to say that all 20 of Coleman's tests appear to be negative or normal. At this point we have agreed to not hold the invasive studies over our heads. He agrees that putting him in the hospital now could make him worse. As long as he's making clinical improvement here, we'll be able to hold those tests off. With that phone call, I truly felt like we were released from prison...and then I remembered what I read ten days before.

Sometimes these things I read are a bit too specific - maybe I'm reading between the lines - maybe I'm seeing what I want to see - maybe there is a God who's trying to get some things through my thick head.

I'm not sure we'll have a solid clinical diagnosis for the illnesses Coleman is fighting, but there are several symptoms that line up, the strongest of which is the original overdose of toxic mold spores. I guess I had my doubts about an illness like that, until it showed up on my doorstep and since then I have read countless articles, books and blogs about real people living with the exact same symptoms we are.

Today was better than yesterday for Coleman and we're moving forward carefully. The look on Coleman's face when I came in the room to tell him he didn't have to worry about painful tests right NOW was the most beautiful thing I have seen in a while....yes, I got misty and we thanked God for hearing us again. This is exactly what Coleman needs to make progress not from fear but from "fun". We're having our new weekly visits with the in-home nurse tomorrow and soon are set to start with a physical therapist in home as well.

Today we talked about the things he would do when he walked again - he says "if" I say "when". He wants to go "wing suit diving" and I want to hike up a small mountain.

We were also shown some great love from some awesome girls in my life. It's amazing to watch how the females flock together when it comes to our families. Thanks to Murph for the pharmacy/chili delivery, to Cherryl for the hamburger, school, and bank run, to Cindy N. for a great verse in a card today about how God knows our every detail, to my mom for dropping off some more exercise equipment and to at least four more girls who sent me emails that hit the spot. Who out there ever had the nerve to say we were the weaker sex? Banded together, we females are strong like rope!